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Aundi Kolber

Aundi Kolber

February 19, 2015 ·

Anchors

Uncategorized

It’s difficult to imagine it now, but my 5’4″ self played college basketball. You know how a lot of people get stopped and asked if they do things, like play sports?

Yeah, that wasn’t me.

It didn’t stop me from loving the game of basketball though. If anything, my size made me hungry to step on the court and play my heart out.

But all my passion never erased my fear. And fear is a big deal.

I vividly remember one of my first games in college. I can still smell the salt of the popcorn maker from the concession stand as we prepared to go out for warmup. To this day, when I smell popcorn in a gym my stomach tightens up a little. 

One of my older teammates had a practice of writing a scripture on her shoes for the season as a reminder. I loved that idea, and decided to do it, too. I quickly wrote the scripture that had been given as my life verse several years earlier by my mom:

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go”

— Joshua 1:9

Even now, as I remember those moments before stepping out to my first college basketball game, I remember what courage it took to BE in the moment. Usually when we’re scared, anxious, angry, or sad it can be so very hard to stay present because that moment feels intolerable.

The verse I wrote on my shoe was a solid, tangible reminder, that I was capable of being in this moment. Just having it on my feet, made me conscious of it when I walked on that court and drew me into the present. Even more, I believed God had promised that He would be with me in the moment and wherever I went. 

In counseling, we often use strategies like “grounding” or “mindfulness” to help folks stay present. The benefit is that when a person is able to stay present it allows their body to process the information/emotion that is being experienced and allows them to keep moving forward without getting “stuck” in the negative emotion i.e. fear. Because when disturbing emotions do get “stuck,” these can create roots for traumas or anxieties. Alternately, when we are able to stay present, we aren’t having to deal with the past or the future and thus we may feel more at ease with just this small chunk of “now” and are less apt to have a root of anxiety around that situation. 

In a way this is what my shoe verse provided. It was a form of distress tolerance for this moment of fear. What I love is that God is faithful in providing these for us. He IS the ultimate distress tolerance.  

While I didn’t understand the significance of my actions then, now as an adult, I am beginning to get why anchors that remind us of truth IN our moments matter. Because the reality is that life is hard and scary…and good. And sometimes we need help staying in the moment that has all of these characteristics in them. 

We all need anchors for our moments that remind us that it is not up to us to fix the past, nor to control the future. God calls us to abide in Him, in this very moment. 

 

What helps you to stay present in your moments? 

 


I’ve linked up this week over at: Intentionally Pursuing the Heart of God, Teressa Jane , Simplified Life, Redemption Diaries, Jennifer Dukes Lee and Suzanne Eller

 

 

 

 

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  1. Jennifer Hand says

    February 19, 2015 at 8:52 pm

    wow. I love this post. What a powerful reminder of the anchor to our fear. I am finding that often the things God has called me to are a wonderful mix of joy and fearfully stepping out in obedience and victory. I love this reminder to be present in the moment following Jesus and the word as the anchor. I a full time speakr and everytime I get up to speak for an event I can find myself afraid… yet called by God to step out in obedience anyway. This was beautiful my fellow living free sister!

    • Andrea Kolber says

      February 20, 2015 at 2:44 am

      Jennifer,
      Thank you for saying hello and for reading. I agree it is such a mix of feelings with living in our moments– I love that God gave us himself to calm all of fears in the midst of it. Thanks for sharing your experience. Best to you!

  2. Crystal Storms says

    February 20, 2015 at 3:59 pm

    Dear Aundi, I love your life verse and how God’s Word brings you courage to be in the moment because He is right there with you. One thing I do to help me stay in the moment and not be overwhelmed by fear or anxiety is squeezing my right hand, which reminds me God walks with me.

    "I keep my eyes always on the Lord. With him at my right hand, I will not be shaken." Psalm 16:8

    Thank you, Aundi, for sharing your encouraging words at #IntentionalTuesday.

    • Andrea Kolber says

      February 20, 2015 at 7:07 pm

      Crystal,
      I love that "anchor" of squeezing your hand. What a beautiful and tangible reminder that God walks with you. Thank you for saying hello and for your kind words!

  3. Becky Goerend says

    February 20, 2015 at 6:54 pm

    What a beautiful post and a great reminder. I needed this today! Thanks for linking up with Tuesday Talk!

    • Andrea Kolber says

      February 20, 2015 at 7:07 pm

      Becky,
      Thanks so much. I appreciate you stopping in to say hello!

  4. Kim S says

    February 21, 2015 at 1:22 pm

    Thank you for your encouragement today – will meditate on Joshua 1:9 as my anchor this weekend. #livefreeThursday
    Have a great one, Kim Stewart
    http://www.kimstewartinspired.com

    • Andrea Kolber says

      February 22, 2015 at 2:50 am

      Kim, thanks so much for stopping by! It’s a great verse, I hope it encourages you. Best to you today.

  5. Victoria Mininger says

    February 24, 2015 at 8:36 pm

    Beautifully said! Worship music helps me stay present. It calms my heart when life gets out of place and helps to give me pause to re-group. Thanks so much for coming by and sharing with us on Simply Inspired Wednesday’s at the Simplified Life. I hope you will join us again tomorrow. ~Victoria

    • Andrea Kolber says

      February 25, 2015 at 7:10 pm

      Victoria, thank you so much for sharing your "anchor." I agree, music is very helpful. Thanks for having me at the link up too! I appreciate you hosting it.

These are for you, if you’re feeling the weariness These are for you, if you’re feeling the weariness of these days or the reality of the pain in our world. May Compassion be a fuel that allows us to love our neighbor as we love ourselves.💛
🌿
Which of these resonate with you today? As always, take what you need, and set down what doesn’t. 
🌿
Aaaaand, just one month late: Happy 1 year anniversary to “Take What You Need: Soft Words for Hard Days.” 🥳 I’m so proud and grateful for this little book. Thank you to each of you who’ve shared about it, left reviews, and reminded me why it’s mattered to you. I’m so honored. If you haven’t already, I’d love for you to check it out (link in stories and profile 🌻) @tyndalehouse 
.
(These affirmations aren’t from the book, but they were inspired by the spirit of it.)
#takewhatyouneed #trysofter #stronglikewater
In our culture, tenderness is often viewed as a li In our culture, tenderness is often viewed as a liability, even and especially the tenderness we gain from healing. But the paradox is, the softness we gain is actually the source of some of our greatest strength. Selah. 
#trysofter #stronglikewater #takewhatyouneed #loveyourneighborasyourself
Healing work is not only about us, but make no mis Healing work is not only about us, but make no mistake — it must include us; it must include the relationship we have with ourselves. 
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At the pace you are able, may your healing come. 
#TrySofter #Stronglikewater #TakeWhatYouNeed #fawning #cptsd
I realize I’m breaking the rules of instagram by p I realize I’m breaking the rules of instagram by posting two selfies in a row, but today is my 43rd birthday so I’m gonna just do the thing. ✌🏻 I’ll say this, it was a hell of a year. I feel proud and grateful, and also, more than a little tired. Waking up to news of wars, widespread sexual abuse cover ups, and the weaponization of a faith I hold dear will do that to anyone paying attention. But also, something I’ve learned as a long term survivor of cPTSD, is how much it matters to hold onto my center; my God-given self. I’ve learned that abuse teaches us to leave ourselves, and we often do, just so we can survive. Which is why it is some of the most sacred work of my life to, by the grace of God, choose to stay instead. 
.
And so that is how I’m entering this year: tenaciously committed to the life + self God has given me, to the people around me, to the work that is a privilege to do. To, as the prophet Micah once wrote, “act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.”
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Thanks to each of you who have been here, who have supported my work, who have spoken life into me. I do not take it lightly. Grateful. xx
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Pink shirt in 1st photo is from @treetopscollective (check out their important work on behalf of refugees in the Grand Rapids, MI. Also, this isn’t an ad, I just love their work :)
Leaving this here to mark the fact that I just tur Leaving this here to mark the fact that I just turned in my 3rd full length manuscript 😭🕯️. Y’all. i. AM. tIRed.
I cannot wait to share about this book with you in the coming year, but what I can say—is something I used to tell myself when I played a whole lot of basketball: “I’m leaving it all on the floor.” Whew. Happy Friday, my dears. (And now to rest)🫶🏻
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It’s for you, if you need it.✌🏻#TakeWhatYouNeed # It’s for you, if you need it.✌🏻#TakeWhatYouNeed 
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This is an evergreen message, but it’s perhaps esp This is an evergreen message, but it’s perhaps especially timely as we navigate this cultural moment. Compassion is soft, but it doesn’t fold. 🌿
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