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Aundi Kolber

Aundi Kolber

April 21, 2019 ·

Easter Changes Everything {Spoken Word Poem}

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Happy Easter! I had the privilege of writing & performing a spoken word poem with my friends over at Westwood Church this morning. I hope it blesses you and helps you to remember how loved we all are (the video is at the bottom).

With deep hope,

Aundi


You whispered in the final minutes before death came, I’m sure—

And what must you have said?

You’re worth it, Beloveds.

Of course, this is my interpretation—but how could you have not?

 

I imagine you thinking about each of the faces you would rescue;

Every heart that is broken,

Every body that is disconnected from goodness,

Every trauma still being relived—

You came to bring it back to rights.

 

Jesus, as you knew what you faced on that cross,

I’m certain you felt fear—of course you did.  

You were fully God and man;

You asked the father to take this cup from you in that garden.

And yet, you chose the harder way even then.

 

Jesus, you were no stranger to a body that is limited—

One who experienced all that comes with humanity.

But I’m certain you thought of the wholeness your pain would bring us.

You remembered why we needed you.

 

And when you considered how vulnerable, how fragile we all are,

I can’t help but hear you say: “You are dust, my loves—but you’re valuable dust.”

And from this dust, you bring back life again and again and again.

 

Then the morning came,

And you threw off death like the King you are.

You broke the chains that bind us, so that even while we are still being made new

You reminded us the final battle is done.

 

Death was trampled SO that we may truly, completely, fully, and unabashedly live.

And while we are still being made new,

You have promised that you never,

No, never, leave us.

 

We needed to know—and still do—

There will be a time that you will set it all to rest.

Jesus, you are the truest, best,

Surest Savior we could ever have.

Easter—Changes Everything.

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Previous Post: « 3 Steps for Handling Unwanted Conversations {Guest Post for Propel Sophia}
Next Post: A Love Letter to Fear »
May you find the way home.🙏 #trysofter #takewhatyo May you find the way home.🙏 #trysofter #takewhatyouneed #fawn #cptsd #stronglikewater 
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*This pattern can also occur with other types of relational trauma. However, it tends to be especially pertinent for survivors of childhood trauma due to the power differential of children with adults and the way kids often adapt by using hyper vigilance, over accommodation, over functioning, and/or fawning to navigate these environments.
Take What You Need // However this weekend finds y Take What You Need // However this weekend finds you, I hope you feel loved. 🫶🏻 #MothersDay #TrySofter #Cptsd #infertility #beloved
Learning to believe your own experience is a vital Learning to believe your own experience is a vital part of healing from relational trauma, especially experiences like narcissistic abuse. For survivors, it’s often been safer to discount your internal world than it is to believe yourself. And this makes sense, because we were wired for connection. But connection was never meant to be a weapon and it’s only when we start to be grounded in reality that we can untangle love or friendship from harm. 
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As we begin to have to have capacity to honor the truth of our experience, we develop the inner trust to live more and more in alignment. May it be so.
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If it feels like a resource, this practice is for you. #takewhatyouneed #trysofter #stronglikewater #beloved #cptsd
Well, I don’t know how your week is ending (ahem, Well, I don’t know how your week is ending (ahem, greetings to you Maycemeber); but I have found myself full up. I have been full with a whole bunch of goodness; good work, but also intensity. Projects and commitments that require a me that is grounded, resourced, & clear. It’s often in those times that I especially remember we are invited to do the gentle & fierce work of keeping our eyes out for goodness. Even the smallest bits matter. What a paradox; its goodness & beauty & connection that help fuel us to meet the difficult demands of being a human. And particularly as a trauma survivor, I am reminded that I, that each of us, get to participate in our own repair. What sacred work. 
🌿
If it feels like a resource, I’ll leave you with this:
🌿
May mercy and goodness ground you in your body, your relationships, and in your place. Made the co-regulating love of the God of the universe be in, above, and around you. May it lead you Home again + again.
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Thank you to @benrector for a fabulous concert. Grateful for my writing pal @ashlee_eiland & her amazing staff at Living Stones for being a wonderful & attentive audience today. Big love & gratitude to a husband (@bckolber) + kiddos who light up with joy alongside me, and thank you to @stewartdantec for sharing the fabulous James Baldwin quote.
Hand over heart // There’s no shame in surviving p Hand over heart // There’s no shame in surviving pain. Coming to honor the truth of our experience is not an indication of our weakness but a move toward deeper integration.🕯️
Sending love. #trysofter #fawn #beloved #stronglikewater #cptsd
Good morning 🌿 Take what you need.🙏 . Inhale: My Good morning 🌿 
Take what you need.🙏
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Inhale: My work is not to prove myself
Exhale: It’s to be myself 
#beloved #trysofter #compassionateattention #stronglikewater #takewhatyouneed
For you, if you need it. 🫶🏻 #trysofter #lovenotest For you, if you need it. 🫶🏻
#trysofter #lovenotestomynervoussystem #stronglikewater #selfcompassion #takewhatyouneed
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