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Aundi Kolber

Aundi Kolber

October 19, 2015 ·

How to Find a Great Counselor {On Learning to Ask for Help}

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I met my dear friend Ashley, at a writer’s conference this summer. She shared bits of her story with me and I realized the beauty of her heart and voice. I am honored to be guest posting over at her place, The Adoption Cafe. 


Most of us, if we’re honest, don’t like asking for help.

We don’t like looking weak, or tired, or less than.

We tend to believe that IF we can be self reliant enough, or prayerful enough, or smart enough (or whatever enough), we’ll get through it.

This can be true in both secular and Christian culture. I find it to be ironic that it’s true in Christian culture however, because we are promised the “Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit” (Psalm 34:18, NIV). If ever there is an invitation to be vulnerable in our weakness, this is it.

There is something important and valuable about weakness though, isn’t there? We don’t need to run from it, because in fact, it may be the very place we find healing. Pain is nothing I wish on any person, and yet, I believe there can be redeeming value there.

Read more at The Adoption Cafe…

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Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Ashley Scott says

    October 19, 2015 at 7:58 pm

    Thank you for sharing your expertise and writing with me, friend!

    • Andrea Kolber says

      October 21, 2015 at 3:07 pm

      It’s my privilege. Thanks for having me.

For you, if you need it. 🫶🏻 #trysofter #lovenotest For you, if you need it. 🫶🏻
#trysofter #lovenotestomynervoussystem #stronglikewater #selfcompassion #takewhatyouneed
For many years now, I’ve loved @dr.thema’s words t For many years now, I’ve loved @dr.thema’s words that remind us that when people get us; when we are seen—it matters. It can change our lives. For me, the most potent parts of @ccfwgr, feel like that. It was a full time, with so many brilliant, creative, and empathic folks in one place. In many ways it was a reparative space for parts of the shadow side of our industry, and I’m grateful for that and to have attended.
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I certainly didn’t get nearly enough pictures with everyone I connected with (and I’m sorry for that!), but I’m wildly grateful for the time and space. Thank you @calvinuniversity and @ccfwgr 🫶🏻
Every time we show up for ourselves in the present Every time we show up for ourselves in the present, we’re also offering a bit of healing to our younger selves, too. May it be so.❤️‍🩹🫶🏻
#trysofter #stronglikewater #healanyway #takewhatyouneed #cptsd
Today in the Christian tradition is Good Friday & Today in the Christian tradition is Good Friday & for trauma survivors in particular, I think of what it means that our God knows what it’s like to exist in a body; an abused body at that.
🌿
Jesus could have come in so many ways, but he chose to show us how deeply we are loved by joining us in our humanity.
🌿
I’m grateful to @marikoclark for sharing these words a few years ago from theologian James Cone—they’ve lived in my heal anyway folder & I return to them often: 
“There can be no Christian theology that is not identified unreservedly with those who are humiliated and abused. In fact, theology ceases to be a theology of the gospel when it fails to arise out of the community of the oppressed.”
-James Cone
🌿
Amen. 
🌿
Our God, with us. 
Much love this Easter season. 
#traumasurvivors #trysofter #cptsd #easter #stronglikewater
For every way trauma has cost you too much, I hono For every way trauma has cost you too much, I honor you. 🙏
🌿
May you find the relational safety you deserve.
May you find your voice in the ways you need.
May your healing come.❤️‍🩹
#trysofter #healanyway #cptsd #beloved #stronglikewater
Just checking in on a few things.✌🏻 As always, tak Just checking in on a few things.✌🏻
As always, take what you need.
.
Do any of these resonate for you? If so, I’d love to hear. ✨
#trysofter #stronglikewater #takewhatyouneed #compassionateresourcing
Good morning. Take what you need.🫶🏻 #trysofter #st Good morning. Take what you need.🫶🏻
#trysofter #stronglikewater #takewhatyouneed
#embodiedboundaries #ItsOkayToSetItDown
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