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Aundi Kolber

Aundi Kolber

August 23, 2016 ·

What I’m Into & An Update

Uncategorized

Hello, dear reader!

I’m trying my hand at something new today. I’m sharing some of my favorite (recent) books and other lovely things. And at the end, I’d love to give you a (big, exciting) update on what’s new with me. 

Lettering: 

Are you like me? Do you drool over beautiful script? My dear friend, Kristie, recently started her own business called “Write It On Your Walls.” I’ve known Kristie since way back in seminary days and she’s always been creative and resourceful. It’s thrilling to see folks come alive doing what they love, isn’t it? This is absolutely true for this gem of a woman and her work reflects it. 

I’m the lucky owner of the sign below and it now hangs proudly in my kitchen. I’d encourage you to follow Kristie on Facebook and Instagram and see more of her beautiful work! 

Books: 

1. Shauna Niequist’s newest book “Present Over Perfect” is speaking my language right now. I’m about half way through and I find myself constantly nodding my head, underlining, and every once in awhile finding I need to stop to digest her words.

Our culture is adept at pushing us to strive. And while I’m all for excellence, it seems our distorted beliefs around value being found in hustling and productivity are slowly killing us. This is why Shauna’s words are a little bit of what we all need to hear right now:

“In seasons of deep transformation, silence will be your greatest guide. Even if it’s scary, especially if it’s scary, let silence be your anchor, your sacred space, your dwelling place. It’s where you will become used to your own voice…Silence will become the incubator for your new found spirit, keeping it safe, growing steadily.” – Shauna Niequist

You can follow Shauna on Facebook or look to purchase her book here. 

2. If you’ve followed me for awhile, you may know I have a passion for reading and from that a hobby developed– launch teams! A launch team is basically a group of folks who share about authors and their stories. Earlier this summer, I had the privilege of launching “Four Letter Words” by Krista Wilbur. I had the opportunity to get to know Krista through the “For the Love” launch team and I have been amazed at her courage. 

Krista’s story reads like a novel but is beautifully and painfully true. (As a counselor, I also want to advise a trigger warning for those of you who’ve experienced abuse). She articulates her experience walking through abuse and trauma and ultimately her resilient move towards healing. I was moved by the way Krista integrated her faith, pain, and story so well– be sure to check her out.  

“He has written me, line by line, a bloom of petals on the page”

-Krista Wilbur

You can follow Krista on Facebook and purchase her book here. 

Music:

Have you met Johnnyswim? They’re basically amazing and if you’ve haven’t heard them yet– may I submit this smooth beauty to you: 

Jewelry: 

Earlier this year, when we lost our precious babe to miscarriage— my heart was broken. There’s simply no way around this truth. And this is how we know we care deeply about something, we hurt over the loss of it. In the months since then, I’ve healed in many respects. One of the things I was blessed to have received in the aftermath of our loss is a beautiful leather bracelet from another sweet friend. She gifted it to me from the fabulously talented Danielle at her online store: Create Hope Cuffs. The words to that little beauty have adorned my wrist so frequently and this is what it says: We Can Do Hard Things. 

How many times have I said this to myself in the last 6 months? Too many to count– and I’m glad I had something so tangible to remind me and ground me. Check out Danielle’s Facebook and Etsy store!  

Update: 

And now, onto a bit of an update. As I mentioned above, I’ve started to share my journey through infertility and miscarriage. I have so appreciated words of kindness as we’ve walked through the grief of those experiences. Both infertility and miscarriage tend to hold heavy stigmas. I hope to use my voice to continue to bring light to the reality of these losses and the courage it takes to process them well. I am passionate and confident in the importance of telling each of our stories–all the pieces of them. This, I’m convinced, is how the healing and the joy become deeper and richer. When we embrace the pain of our story we find God is sitting with us, loving us deeply, moving us toward healing. 

So, to keep things REALLY interesting– I also find myself typing at my computer with a baby boy in my belly– 22 weeks pregnant. (Eeeeekkkk!!!!!!)

This has been something I’ve kept tucked close for awhile, but it’s a joy to share with you now. As our story unfolds I’m sure I’ll be writing more in the future. For now, I’d love your prayers as we move forward– stunned at God’s faithfulness and grateful for the journey. 

Thank you again for your love and support. 

Aundi

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Previous Post: « The Weight of It {When Words Matter}
Next Post: When the Hustle Can’t Make You Whole »
It’s really hard to experience God as safe when yo It’s really hard to experience God as safe when you’re taught theology that defends abusers and abandons the abused.
🌿
May there be a repair for every untruth that has facilitated your harm.
🌿
May your healing come. 🙏
(As always take what you need). #StayWithYourself 
#TrySofter #LoveYourNeighborASYourself #religioustrauma survivor-centered trauma-informed
Being able to name our experience is so helpful & Being able to name our experience is so helpful & important, but with the fawn response—it can start to feel suffocating to know about what we’re experiencing and feel like we can’t change it. 
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And yet, we can learn to work “with” our fawn response; living from our Center instead of survival. #staywithyourself #trysofter #stronglikewater #cptsd
If it resonates, it’s for you. May you have what y If it resonates, it’s for you. May you have what you need to stay with yourself.🕯️#StayWithYourself #TrySofter #LoveyourneighborASYourself #StronglikeWater #TakeWhatYouNeed
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Fawn, fawn response, cPTSD, healing, nervous system, religious trauma, attachment trauma, alignment, faith and mental health
A huge congrats to my dear friend, @chuckdegroat o A huge congrats to my dear friend, @chuckdegroat on the release of his newest offering, “Who You’re Becoming: The Slow and Courageous Work of Cultivating Character in a Narcissistic Age.” This is a phenomenally timely book, written by someone who works to embody what he writes. I was honored to endorse it. Here’s what I said:
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“In the midst of our unmoored, image obsessed culture, Dr. Chuck DeGroat offers us the grounding wisdom we so often forget: God is with us as we become ourselves. With kindness and deft insight, DeGroat leads us through the practical, courageous, and often slow work required to cultivate maturity and true character. In so doing, Who You’re Becoming serves as a powerful and needed guide for anyone wanting to go beyond a try-hard faith or mere surface level change—so they can deepen into their truest, beloved selves.”
Aundi Kolber MA, LPC
Therapist & Author of Try Softer and Strong like Water
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Congrats, Chuck! You can find “Who You’re Becoming” wherever books are sold (link in stories or check out an excerpt on my substack today—also in stories 🎉)
#WhoYoureBecoming
There can be so much valid grief that comes from l There can be so much valid grief that comes from losing relationships while you heal.*
🍁 
But if you have to choose between keeping a relationship & keeping you—l hope you choose you.
🍁
God does not abandon you, & you don’t have to abandon yourself either. Selah. 
(As always, take what you need 🕯️)
#StayWithYourself #Fawning #TrySofter #Cptsd #narcissticabuse 
🍁
Need more resources & insight? You can pre-order my newest offering, “Stay With Yourself,” that addresses exactly these issues (link in profile).
🍁
*For example, from setting healthy boundaries, advocating for yourself, or being unwilling to participate in toxic dynamics.
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 Boundaries | embodied boundaries | interpersonal trauma | relationships | self compassion | integrating faith and mental health
Importantly, we don’t regulate to bypass valid emo Importantly, we don’t regulate to bypass valid emotions around injustice or harm一but rather so we can access the clarity to live in alignment even amidst intensity.
🌿 
And so may you find Ground that holds you steady.
#StayWithYourself #StronglikeWater #TrySofter #regulation #LoveYourNeighborASYourself
May your healing come. 🪴🫶🏻✨ #StayWithYourself #Try May your healing come. 🪴🫶🏻✨
#StayWithYourself #TrySofter #StronglikeWater #HealAnyway #TakeWhatYouNee
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Fawn | trauma | trauma resolution | cPTSD | religious trauma | nervous system | attachment trauma | complex trauma | grief | faith and mental health | self compassion | compassionate attention
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