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Aundi Kolber

Aundi Kolber

August 18, 2015 ·

For the Love Series {Book Launch and A Giveaway}

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For months now, I’ve been trying to figure out my favorite part of Jen Hatmaker’s new book, “For the Love.” It’s been nearly 6 months since I was asked to be on the launch team and it feels like a whirlwind experience. Part of the reason is because I’ve had the opportunity to be part of an amazing community we call the #500. I blogged about the experience here and I continue to be amazed by it. 

And then, after I read the book (the first time) I wrote this post regarding healthy boundaries and saying ‘no.’  This is what Jen refers to as having a “balanced beam.” And that general theme is still pretty high up on my favs list. But the truth is, as of this moment I’m still trying to figure out exactly what I love the most. It’s not that there aren’t exceptional parts (there are).

It’s that there are so many.

But because today is launch day and I believe this book is fabulous, I’m going to give my favorite pieces a shot.

**

As a counselor, I have a particular propensity to listen closely when a Christian leader discusses principles around self-care, boundaries, parenting and relationships. This is because there’s a whole heap of terrible advice out there. We hear suggestions like: Be better, ignore it, try harder, pray exactly this way, or even buy this one thing and your life will be perfect. 

Hogwash.

Or, as Jen would say, “Horsecrappery.” 

These thoughts are usually well-intentioned, but they frequently come from a place of ignorance, privilege, and poor theology. Additionally, I think they add to the well of shame that so many of us can get stuck in. Most importantly, these little gems are lacking because they focus on our own actions versus the ultimate life giver of change and perspective.

 Photo Credit: Bethany Beams

Photo Credit: Bethany Beams

We all have a responsibility in our actions and life, but unless we recognize our need to weave grace into every nook and cranny of our existence, our actions will fall flat.

This is what Jen does so well in “For the Love,” she models this fragrant grace that we all so desperately want and need. She proposes that we can’t go wrong with integrating love and grace in all things. 

We can’t love God too much, or people, or kiddos, or our spouses, our churches or even ourselves. It’s always a win to love well.

True life giving love is the result of who we become as Christians. And, when we know Jesus, it’s as if we have access to the well that doesn’t run dry.

Sure, there can be particular ways to love each other well, but we never succeed by throwing in a heaping dose of judgment or control or worry.

Jen says it so well here:

“God measures our entire existence by only two things: How we love Him and how we love people. If you get this right, you can get a million other things wrong “ (pg 66).

And so dear readers, may I just say to you, this book is worth your time. Jen weaves in her love of Jesus within her love of people in each and every page. Sometimes you’ll snort as she discusses why leggings aren’t pants and sometimes you’ll bawl when she talks about the way she loves her kiddos, but you’ll know she is with you and for you. 


Interested in reading “For the Love”? Leave me a comment and tell me why you’d like to read it or sign up for my email list (for 2 entries)! I’ll pick a winner by Friday, August 21st. Check back here on Friday to see who won! 

 

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Previous Post: « When You Choose to Breathe {You May Find Life}
Next Post: Hurts So Good {On Learning to Stay With It} »

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Ashley Scott says

    August 18, 2015 at 7:44 pm

    Such an elegant post. You have such a rational and loving way of tying our Christian walk to real life. I am not the biggest Jen fan, but I’d love for this book to be the one that changes my opinion…and I’m a huge Aundi fan, so if you like it this much I probably will too!

    • Andrea Kolber says

      August 19, 2015 at 6:22 pm

      Ashley, you are so gracious! Thank you friend for your kind words and I do believe this book could make you a Jen fan.

      • Andrea Kolber says

        August 22, 2015 at 1:12 pm

        Ashley, congrats on winning the book giveaway!

  2. Kelly Ivey Johnson says

    August 18, 2015 at 11:15 pm

    LOVE your post and love your writing, as usual. Don’t enter me in the contest, as I already own 10 and I’m also trying to give them away :-), but just wanted you to know that I think you nailed it! See you soon!

    • Andrea Kolber says

      August 19, 2015 at 6:22 pm

      You are such an encouragement to me Kelly! It has been a pleasure to be on the launch team with you!

  3. Rebecca Katzer says

    August 19, 2015 at 5:24 am

    "We all have a responsibility in our actions and life, but unless we recognize our need to weave grace into every nook and cranny of our existence, our actions will fall flat."

    I needed this today. Thanks, friend.

    • Andrea Kolber says

      August 19, 2015 at 6:23 pm

      You are so very welcome. Thank you for reading and saying hello!

In trauma work, this is called “titration”—and it In trauma work, this is called “titration”—and it can be a vital posture to help pace ourselves when we’re faced with too much (whether from past trauma, current overwhelm or both).
🌿
May you have what you need to take the smallest step in the right direction. 🫶🏻
#trysofter
#stronglikewater #takewhatyouneed #nervoussystemwork #regulation
But here, may your shattered pieces be gathered; b But here, may your shattered pieces be gathered; back to yourself & back to your Creator.
🌿
Here, may you know it makes sense to feel what you feel.
🌿
You are & may still be passing through the valley of the shadow, so if all you can do is breathe...
🌿
Then breathe.
.
In honor of World Suicide Prevention Day // 
Supporting trauma survivors is suicide prevention 
❤️‍🩹✌🏻 
#trysofter #cptsd #grief #healing #stronglikewater
.
(Originally written and shared in 2022 🫶🏻)
A few soft & fierce notes for you today. As always A few soft & fierce notes for you today. As always, take what you need.🌿
#trysofter #fierceselfcompassion #stronglikewater #cptsd #loveyourneighborASYourself
Whether it’s in a family, a romantic relationship, Whether it’s in a family, a romantic relationship, a church, a Netflix documentary (#MicaMiller), or a friendship—one of the goals of narcissistic abuse is to destabilize and disorient. 
.
May you have what you need to come home to your God-given center.🌿
#trysofter #stronglikewater #narcissisticabuse #cptsd 
Fawning
Holding these thoughts like a prayer tonight. If i Holding these thoughts like a prayer tonight. If it resonates, it’s for you.🫶🏻 
#trysofter #stronglikewater #cptsd #healing #trauma
A few soft & fierce reminders for you tonight. As A few soft & fierce reminders for you tonight. As always, take what you need.🌿
#trysofter #stronglikwater #LoveYourNeighborAsYourself #cptsd #fawning 
fierceselfcompassion selfcompassion
Am I an expressive speaker? You better believe it. Am I an expressive speaker? You better believe it. 🙃 
🌿
It was an honor to be with The Abundant Conference this weekend in St. Louis, helping to address and resource folks in the work of integrating faith and mental health; and ultimately, leaning into a paradoxical truth that God invites us toward—“to be soft is to be strong.”
.
(So much gratitude to The Crossing Church, JoyFM, and each of the gifted speakers who shared their heart and talents. ✨🫶🏻)
#TrySofter #StronglikeWater #Beloved #LoveYourNeighborASYourself 
@curtthompsonmd @iamdavidhawkins @991joyfm @bdwmusic @crossingstl 
.
Also, thanks to @emilyachristopher for the first picture.💛
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