In the Meantime: Thoughts on Grieving Well

I heard someone say once, “To be human is to grieve.” I couldn’t agree more.

Our family has recently gone through a season of grief and it reminds me again why I love educating people about emotional health, trauma, and pain. 

This recent experience brought these thoughts to mind, and really, they’re for all of us. 

Enjoy.

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In the meantime, while you lick your wounds, I hope you’ll be gentle with your heart.

I hope you’ll tell the voice in your head—the loud, booming, accusing voice—to leave. Or at least be quiet.

I hope you’ll seek out people who love you well.

I hope you give yourself some radical self love; the kind you wish to receive from others, but sometimes need to give yourself.

I hope you’ll pass on commitments that are too big right now, and focus on the next right thing. 

I hope you’ll give yourself room to grieve. And when—not if—the big tears come, I hope you’ll bring compassion as you observe your pain.

I hope you’ll give yourself permission to say ‘no’ and take space from people who don’t get it.

I hope when you’re tempted to find an easy fix; instead you’ll lean into your resources, and your people, and your God so they may give you the courage and strength to keep going.

I hope instead of condemnation for your pain, you’ll feel freedom to feel all the feelings.  

I hope you allow the pain to move through you instead of become stuck in your soul. And as you do, I pray you notice the tingling of change and courage and acceptance start to plant their seeds.  

I hope at some point you take stock of your progress. And when you do, I pray you feel proud of the road you’ve walked. 

I hope you begin to see your wounds turn into battle scars. And when they turn, I hope you wear it like a badge of honor, proving you are still here—you’re still walking.

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In the meantime, I hope you feel loved. 

I hope you feel seen.

I hope you can allow other folks to carry you for a bit, until you feel strong enough to walk again.

I hope you experience the tangible comfort of Jesus—the ultimate wounded healer. The one who used and uses his scars to heal us.

And dear one, when the meantime is over, I hope you heal and become even more certain of your beloved-ness and value.