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Aundi Kolber

Aundi Kolber

Latest from the Blog

July 26, 2018 ·

3 Ways to Grow Spiritually We Don’t Hear Enough About {Guest Post for Relevant}

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Several years ago, I started to feel stuck as a therapist. I found many clients desired change, but instead, continually cycled through self-sabotaging behaviors or felt suffocated by shame.“What is it?” They wondered to me aloud.Don’t I want it enough? Am I not praying enough? Not enough faith?I ...
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July 10, 2018 ·

Interview: EMDR {On the Weary Christian}

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I'm privileged to have been interviewed recently by Christian Heinze over at The Weary Christian: If you haven’t heard of EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing) you soon will, and if you have, you might have tried it, and if you’ve tried it, it could have helped change your ...
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June 15, 2018 ·

When the Wound is Healing {Father’s Day Re-Visited}

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Three years ago I wrote one of the most difficult posts of my life. In it, I describe why Father’s Day is deeply painful for me. Mostly, because my own dad isn’t, can't be, in my life. While this continues to be the healthiest choice for me, it is still tinged with grief.  You see, ...
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December 19, 2017 ·

3 Ways to Support Someone Recovering From Trauma {Guest Post for Relevant Magazine}

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In my days as a novice therapist, I was terrified to work with trauma survivors. I had been given tools and plenty of support from supervisors, sure. But as a trauma survivor myself, I worried I wouldn’t support them adequately. My greatest fear was to re-traumatize people. Graciously, in the ...
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December 6, 2017 ·

Waiting for a Miracle {Guest Post for The Redbud Post}

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Happy Advent, dear readers!If you've been following along with me for awhile, you'll recognize this piece from last year, written prior to the birth of our new son. However, I had a chance to contribute to the newest addition of The Redbud Post which features experiencing Advent: The Sacred Amidst ...
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October 2, 2017 ·

The Spiritual Act of Honoring Pain

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"If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten we belong to each other." -Mother TheresaI awoke this morning and the air felt heavy, maybe because sometimes grief can be sensed before it is spoken. I looked at my phone and saw an alert telling me the deadliest shooting in modern history ...
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May you find the way home.🙏 #trysofter #takewhatyo May you find the way home.🙏 #trysofter #takewhatyouneed #fawn #cptsd #stronglikewater 
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*This pattern can also occur with other types of relational trauma. However, it tends to be especially pertinent for survivors of childhood trauma due to the power differential of children with adults and the way kids often adapt by using hyper vigilance, over accommodation, over functioning, and/or fawning to navigate these environments.
Take What You Need // However this weekend finds y Take What You Need // However this weekend finds you, I hope you feel loved. 🫶🏻 #MothersDay #TrySofter #Cptsd #infertility #beloved
Learning to believe your own experience is a vital Learning to believe your own experience is a vital part of healing from relational trauma, especially experiences like narcissistic abuse. For survivors, it’s often been safer to discount your internal world than it is to believe yourself. And this makes sense, because we were wired for connection. But connection was never meant to be a weapon and it’s only when we start to be grounded in reality that we can untangle love or friendship from harm. 
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As we begin to have to have capacity to honor the truth of our experience, we develop the inner trust to live more and more in alignment. May it be so.
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If it feels like a resource, this practice is for you. #takewhatyouneed #trysofter #stronglikewater #beloved #cptsd
Well, I don’t know how your week is ending (ahem, Well, I don’t know how your week is ending (ahem, greetings to you Maycemeber); but I have found myself full up. I have been full with a whole bunch of goodness; good work, but also intensity. Projects and commitments that require a me that is grounded, resourced, & clear. It’s often in those times that I especially remember we are invited to do the gentle & fierce work of keeping our eyes out for goodness. Even the smallest bits matter. What a paradox; its goodness & beauty & connection that help fuel us to meet the difficult demands of being a human. And particularly as a trauma survivor, I am reminded that I, that each of us, get to participate in our own repair. What sacred work. 
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If it feels like a resource, I’ll leave you with this:
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May mercy and goodness ground you in your body, your relationships, and in your place. Made the co-regulating love of the God of the universe be in, above, and around you. May it lead you Home again + again.
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Thank you to @benrector for a fabulous concert. Grateful for my writing pal @ashlee_eiland & her amazing staff at Living Stones for being a wonderful & attentive audience today. Big love & gratitude to a husband (@bckolber) + kiddos who light up with joy alongside me, and thank you to @stewartdantec for sharing the fabulous James Baldwin quote.
Hand over heart // There’s no shame in surviving p Hand over heart // There’s no shame in surviving pain. Coming to honor the truth of our experience is not an indication of our weakness but a move toward deeper integration.🕯️
Sending love. #trysofter #fawn #beloved #stronglikewater #cptsd
Good morning 🌿 Take what you need.🙏 . Inhale: My Good morning 🌿 
Take what you need.🙏
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Inhale: My work is not to prove myself
Exhale: It’s to be myself 
#beloved #trysofter #compassionateattention #stronglikewater #takewhatyouneed
For you, if you need it. 🫶🏻 #trysofter #lovenotest For you, if you need it. 🫶🏻
#trysofter #lovenotestomynervoussystem #stronglikewater #selfcompassion #takewhatyouneed
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